Sunday, July 29, 2007
This post is specially for my son -- taytingyu. =)
heartening arhs ? =DD
How important are you in my life?
ans is very very important arh.. sometimes some words i can only tell you comfortably and not some other people. do you remember that in singapore conference hall, the day we were having our syfs? you shouted across a few seats saying 'meizhen, i love you' and without any hesitance, i told you 'i love you too'. come to think of it, you should noe how much you meant to me bah =) simple words did mean not simple meanings arh. =)
Have you ever existed?
Maybe you didnt existed in some other people's lives but you did exist in mine~ at sec 1 & 2, i dont noe you much, it's only sec 3 and 4 we have been closer to each other. at sec 1 & 2, at most i only know you be a student in 1e4, same class with meihui and keyang. then sec 3 & 4, co vice chairman, one bg member.. now coming to our close to 2++ years of friendship( i presume our friendship started at sec 3 ) =D , you have been one of the supports i have through o level and now going to promos. in one way or another you taught me how to put down something that has been troubling me. but the weird thing is you also cant put down some things that you should put down~ i understand it's not easy. so jia you ok? =D
Continue to smile~ and laugh and do whatever you want =) remember there always your mama behind supporting you! all the best for promos and i know you will make it =DD
Vented by lazygirlx
7/29/2007 03:28:00 PM
Monday, July 23, 2007
It feels great to be home again. today never go sch =X duh. over-exerted myself, i need some rest.
20 july 2007 =)
After attending lessons, i was excused from class from 1.1opm onwards. awaiting to go for leadership training camp. I was quite reluctant to go though. Don't know why, perhaps didnt have that camping mood bah. On the bus sat with leemeijia =) hehe have fun talking and playing on the bus. lightened my mood to the camp. When the bus finally arrived at laboror adventure centre ( erms dont know how to spell =x ), we were like.. woah so ulu worh! packed our bunks and realised that we can sleep on beds. not that bad afterall. went to form groups, met my group members and the 1st game started =) My facilitator is Yvonne and she appointed herman to be the leader for 1st game and he chose me as his partner. The game is supposed to go this way, both of us, together with other representives from other groups have to stand on stage. The others are being black-folded and we are supposed to shout for them to the stage and arrange them according to birthdates( from the youngest to the oldest) it was really tough when all of us are shouting for our team mates. the rule for this game is that representives are not supposed to go down the stage. Herman and i were sweating profusely after the game had ended. After we sat down, there were still other teams still playing. we observed them and Yvonne said that there was a girl sitting there not moving at all, though their team mates were searching for her. She said this is not the way a leader should be, instead a leader should stand up and search around. Anyway i fell down at the 2nd game and not a lot cared, that's the part when i began to tone down a bit.
The rest of the day was sort of lecture, teaching us what are leadership qualities, asking us to create our own visions and etc. there was a game at night. it is called the survival game. michelle took the initiative to step up to be a leader. In e event of the game, only one group survived. a lot of learning points to be picked up. A significant game! =)
There comes a horrible part, whereby we need to rank the top 3 leaders and bottom 3 leaders. I ranked myself last and get ranked by the others 2 times for 3rd top leader. I realised i have low level of confidence. This was a really very open conversation. Everyone have to be frank with one another. That is what i can't face and can't do as well, but i have done it. accepting feedbacks and everything.
Chatted with zhiying whose bed is next to mine! =) haha chatted till around 1am then sleep. duh!
21st July
As the clock striked 12am, birthday messages started to come in. In total, i received 36 messages on this special day of mine! =) thanks all of you for wishing me yeahs !
We learnt about conflict management and win-win situations today. It was kinda hard again, directly saying out your discomfort and everything in front of all. =) The most significant games are tug-of-war and road course today. tug-of-war teaches us what is 100% committment. There was once my team actually won. I really felt 100% committment at that time. I felt it and I'm gonna remember that kind of feelings. It's wonderful!
for road course, i volunteered to be leader and i know i didnt do well. at the start we were required to discuss plans as a team. Then actually i wanted to write down everything they have said, but in e end i saw this girl was writing down, then i thought it should be alright for her to write. in e end i dont understand her handwriting, then only leader can tell the facilitator what the group wants to go 1st, whether is it high elements, intermediate elements, rock wall and caterpillar. the duration to complete everything is 2hr30mins. i told the facilitator what we wanted to do, then she wants specifically who are going up for the elements, as max only 6 person can go up each one. In total, there are only 3 high elements, 3 low elements, 2 lanes of rockwall and caterpillar. For caterpillar, there is a special thing for it, 12 person must participate but only counted as 6 person has attempted it. Each of us have to complete 1 high element, 1 intermediate element, 1 rock wall or caterpillar! At 1 point of time, i didnt write down who are going up for one of the high elements and resulted in waste of time, thinking who are supposed to go up. Then i asked Yvonne to tell me and she refused. she just said 'can a hunter just keep aiming for targets but not shooting for the target? That was then i started thinking who are supposed to go up. For the last person to go up, i thought it was radolph but there was a voice in me saying it was me. but i asked radolph to try 1st, then radolph told me he saw yvonne shooking her head. then we thought that it was because there was no supporter for radolph, but in e end it was because i chose the wrong person. The last person is me. At that point of time, i knew that a lot of my team mates are pissed off. I went up to the high element, they cheered for me, i balanced myself slowly but there was this fear that was holding me back, but when i grabbed the 1st support, i advanced quickly and by the time i reached the group, there was this team mate said that hey girl, u made up for the time! they said i was very fast to come down!
Anyway, did i say that i nearly broke down when yvonne gave me that kind of face that she is disgusted by how i lead? however i held my tears back and continue to lead. my group came in 2nd, but i know deep in my heart, i didnt lead them well at all. yvonne said that i got lots of learning points from this event. havent got the chance to ask her much anyway. during the debrief for the game, the 1st person (girl) to say her feelings and experience cried. then this was the time i felt that i can no longer hold my tears back. When it was time for me to say, i cried. Yvonne said that i took very long to open up to my team mates, i agreed on that. It was not easy for me to open up to people. It's kind of hard for me, cos i dont wanna be hurt.
Many people cried during this camp, it has forced many to the point of breaking down. That was the limit.
22nd july
The most significant game is threading the rope through spider web, it is called silent spider web. it requires concentration. no one is supposed to touch the spider web and talk, only hand gestures are allowed. this is when honesty came in. i accidently touched a string and then i was stunned. before i could react, my fren said ' touched.' then we ran out of the site. as every time we break the rules, we must run out. at that time, i felt ashamed of myself. no honesty and no integrity. but towards the end of the game, this fren of mine and i saw the string being touched, i said touched very softly and one of the guys stared at me. i felt super innocent man. in e end the facilitator didnt see it and we are so close to the last box, people just dont want to face it. sigh. people are hard to please man.
Anyway towards the end of camp, after packing up the bunks and everything, we sat in the hall, listening to the song. the song is of great significant, though some lyrics are hard to hear. cos the hall is full of echo! anyway there was a bag of pebbles. we are supposed to present the pebbles as gems to the ones we wanna give =) it was significant man! nearly cried again. lol emotional time~ after being through so much with them, it's just cool!
Most significant and meaningful camp in my life. A camp that taught me a lot a lot! it really pushes me to the limit. I thank everyone that have involved in this camp~
i want to thank those who cared about me =) i know i must have worried you guys when i said i cried in the camp. thank all of you for supporting me yeah =)
Vented by lazygirlx
7/23/2007 03:15:00 PM
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
I wonder how I should start this post. But anyway I have started. hehe the 5 of you ( you know who you are yeahs =] ) thanks so much for today's surprise! =) I'm quite happy for the presents arhs, though I kept saying that WOW I DON'T WANT LAH~ hehe today is so funny! Today after sch, i was like.. wanting to go to library to borrow books for my project work, then actually they wanted to meet out for a random gathering, since it's like we so long never meet out le, i didn't even suspect man~ then i said that i have to borrow books before i can go dinner and they waited for me, i was thinking how come they so suspicious, but didnt think so much into it, then finally i found my books then went down to find them at the 1st floor cos they were too noisy upstairs =X. Then we went to TM where we found xinyi, after which we went to the toilet, that was when everything started ERPS I was like.. don't know wanna go toilet anot, then i went in with them cos jayne wanna go, in e end emily popped out with the presents arh then asked me to try. They asked me to come out and let them see, I was actually relunctant lah, but in e end gave in cos they bought for me if don't let them see , a little bad lah. then i went out and let them see, by that time jayne haven go into the toilet, then jayne appeared to be super super urgent and went into my cubical with my bag hanging on the door, my uniform on the covered toilet bowl. IN THE END YOU ALL KNOW WHAT DID SHE DO? SHE HID MY UNIFORM IN HER BAG AND RAN OUT. I actually didnt know it lah, then went in and wanting to change back to my uniform. then OMG WHERE'S MY UNIFORM?! then i realised confirmed is jayne took one ~ duh~ cute girl, hehe in e end they still didnt manage to make me wear the skirt and shirt out~ TOO BAD~ and yeahs, I promised I'll wear the shirt and skirt out ok? =) It's not that I don't wanna wear out to let u all see ok? It's just that I'm too shy lah =X hahahahahaha! and thanks a lot for the treat anyway~ Plus you guys really know me lah =) PASTA~ hehe love you guys yeahs. AND SWEETIE, YOU WATCH OUT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY, 14 OCTOBER~ YOU WAIT! *evil grins*
I already received 3 presents already =) hehe quite happy lah~ hee anyway also quite look forward to celebrate birthday in camp lah~ but don't wanna get sabo, so maybe must be careful not to leak out the SECRET~ hehe
Today super funny lah, that zhiying actually looked at me up and down, side and side then finally concluded that i don't lack of something except a boyfriend -.- then i was like.. HAHAHA like real. hehes then i said i only want my eyecandy! HEH now everyday zhiying is planning my route in sch so that i get to see HIM~ hehe today saw him once! did i ? *wonders* yeahhsss! i did i did! hehe =) it's like everyday see him once. alamaks. the sch got so big mahs? =x hehe nvm bahs, once is enough~ be satisfacted! anyway time to get back to my work! =)))
Wednesday - cultural night rehearsal
Thursday - cultural night!
Friday - to camp already! =)
await for my arrival back home on Sunday~ =DDD
Vented by lazygirlx
7/17/2007 09:49:00 PM
Saturday, July 14, 2007
This week has just gone past like this. I meant the 5 studying days. Not that i like it to pass thru fast, it's just that I was rather amazed that time passes so fast. On Monday, I was like.. reluctant to go to school, because I know I'm going face a lot of homeworks and need to catch up with everything i misssed during the 2days' MC. I wanted the week to pass thru asap, I know my toughest days are thursday and friday, now that I managed to live this two days, I realised that i haven't start my revision. DUH~ but I did my homework diligently, that's one thing that i have managed to convince myself that i did something quite good =) trying to get back that drive in studying =D
Today I was rather on a happier mood, perhaps because that I realised that I managed to keep myself awake during the 2 physics periods today, though i did fall asleep halfway lah. That Ying actually asked Sammie to push me, because she don't want me to fall asleep during lecture and she said when Sammie wanted to push, then i was awake again. phew, count myself lucky, if not i fall down from the chair, imagine that scene, aiyoh, how unglam would I be?!
Today CO was okay, but I don't know why I feel no sense of achievement today. Ever since I became vp, I realised that I'll either unintentionally hurt someone's feeling or make someone feel unhappy. Even though I'm supposed to be the black face lah, it's still uncomfortable to see someone feeling unhappy/sad when you said someone or what. Sometimes I'll convince myself that they deserved it lah, but sometimes when i accidentally said someone when the person is supposedly not to be in the wrong, I'll feel terrible but like.. If i apologise to them face to face, I'll feel weird and the person will feel weird too. Furthermore when the person is whom you know quite well, the moment he/she did something wrong and you have to resort in pointing out what's wrong, the chances of affecting the friendship are rather high. I felt that what my friend said today was quite true, in this kind of thing, everyone must have high EQ, if not how can we survive?
After CO, i went to meet my J a.k.a zaid~ =) (side track a bit: I'm sorry, honey and yang, got to ps you girls last minute, because i got the wrong time =x ) I admit this few days I'm kinda blur, I actually thought it's tml I'll meet J and then the moment i knew i was wrong, J was already at Tamp Mart playing LAN. DUH~ BLUR BLUR~ but anyway, went to eat b&j and THANKS J FOR TREATING ME~ chatted with him and made fun of him (actually most of the time is he made fun of me 0.0) After eating b&j, we wanted to go to TM for Hokkaido food fair over there, however when we reached there, we saw ahqi, who asked us to help her to send a crew home. Since I know the girl, J and I agreed to fetch her. and that J arh, wasnt able to walk ard for the Hokkaido fair because by the time we returned to TM, it was closed alr =X TOO BAD HUH?! =/ OH yeah, I laughed at J on the way back to TM, just because he carried the girl's bag erms. what description should i give? erms.. aiyahs it's just SO FUNNY la~ returned to TM and chatted with ahqi outside mac and found out a lot of updates from her. =) quite enjoyable hearing all these things. Although I'm resigning, I still feel that i belong to there bah =) It has been 3 years since i worked there, though i didnt work very often. There are quite a lot of memories over there. Seeing them so tired, I also feel as though I was with them doing the same thing, enduring the same physical tired-ness. I'll drop by to say hi, as long as i can bah =) miss them a lot~ anyway after that we waited for ahqi to leave with us =) crapped along the way with J while ahqi kept calling her friend. lols. By the time, I reached home, it's like 12 am. This is the 1st time I went home so late with my jc uniform duh~
Anyway, J arhs, if I'm becoming your scandal, let's play along as you and dajiejie did. hehes! =DD
Vented by lazygirlx
7/14/2007 01:22:00 AM
Sunday, July 08, 2007
Tomorrow is sch again, so don't feel like going back, when i got a long weekend!
Now I'm doing CO investiture proposal, but Mr Wong is so not free to meet us.
Yesterday sat at TECC so long, until I'm like.. so cold! i dont feel like talking at all, because i wasnt feeling well, glad that no one noticed that i'm not feeling well, don't wanna make it a big fuss, since my Exco already know I'm not feeling well since friday, i don't wanna them think that because i'm sick, i can slack or something like that.
Anyway the meeting was quite alright, completed most of the paperwork, now left are those hands-on things. =)
I'm quite proud to have all these people in my exco =)) this ish true yeah!
Hmm. i shall go and do my proposal again bah! think i haven include a lot of things arhS =)
SMILES!
Vented by lazygirlx
7/08/2007 03:35:00 PM
Thursday, July 05, 2007
hmm finally i updated! haha tsktsk. quite a long time i didnt blog.
I'll have a long weekend, since i have MC for 2 days. LOL
but i'll still go for cca tomorrow! hehe
The doc actually told me not to go under sun for this few days, the best is not to go out of house.
I don't want! i promise that i will not go under the sun but i'll still go out, if not, i'll be bored to death. =))
anyway i didnt get selected in for A*stars research, but i'm gonna try my luck for overseas community involvment this year end, since i no longer need to be attached to A*stars.
but that kai arhs, actually told me Laos is not safe and she's not going, though she wanted to.
Maybe i should research on Laos bah. =))
OCIP is waiting for me! hehe i hope i wont fail my interview again =(
Vented by lazygirlx
7/05/2007 06:53:00 PM